stigma blog: non-anon

What to do when you are told others want to crucify you? I do not want to go through this whole sado-masochist ritual forever, honestly…

Two dear ladies who are actually not ladies at all, but witches, thought they had me forever in bondage in their rituals. No thanks!

I want out–like yesterday. They do not want me to see them or talk to them? Peachy!

They are so narcissistic they think that that is a punishment. Really? It’s covert narcissism.

That’s a reward that I get to leave and find recovery. News flash: I do not find you attractive, nor do I want to watch the train wreck unfolding. I truly do not.

It’s bad enough that I apply for an addictions recovery writing job and two different times all my work is deleted. Am I a Tibetan monk doing sand painting? I do not have that kind of patience–or do I? I guess I just can’t resist trying again. Is this glutton for punishment seeking food-recovery? Guess so…Guilty as charged!

Unlike “livin in a dream” I can actually write. Ya, I am a handicapped writer, but that’s because only the best racehorses carry an extra load. I can run barrels of ink around her prose. Maybe she can’t stand that she can’t write.

It may just be that green-eyed monster all along. Oh well! It stinks to be uninspired and declasse. At least the Tennessee Walkers are flashy and gorgeous even if tortured…the poor tired spent dear is just burdened…

It is just an ugly picture all the way around. Glad not to have to see it anymore…

Adios non-amigos!

ISOFaithfulandTrue–the blog: in memory of Carol Brett

So missing the wisdom, heart and genius of Carol Brett today…


“We put bits in the horse’s mouths that they may obey us

And we turn about their whole bodies

So is the tongue a little member and boasteth great things”

From the Fulmer bit in Splendid High’s mouth

To the Zenith on his back

And the cavesson for lungeing him

Carol Brett in inextricably bound in

With my life with my Splendid High partner, known as Mel

She dubbed him “Mellifluous” because his gaits flow as smoothly as honey

He is Doctor Mellifluous to me, as a Saint Bernard rescue dog it to a stranded traveler

And I would never have met him if it weren’t for Carol Brett.

She taught at a clinic and advocated for my being able to attend

And stood up for me when all the town believed the calumny.

Carol Brett is my heroine and will always be so.

Because of what she taught me…

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“Victims should know that the Pope is on their side.” A MOST EGREGIOUS LIE! — The Open Tabernacle: Here Comes Everybody

After the release of the Pennsylvania Grand Jury report revealing decades of clerical sex abuse and cover up, yesterday a Vatican spokesman declared, “Victims should know that the Pope is on their side. Those who have suffered are his priority, and the Church wants to listen to them to root out this tragic horror that […]

via “Victims should know that the Pope is on their side.” A MOST EGREGIOUS LIE! — The Open Tabernacle: Here Comes Everybody

Stigma blog: Off-The-Wall–a Street Survival Journal (8-11-18)

Assigned the task of advocating for special needs trust recipients, I begin this journal of my off-the-wall crazy financial situation. I hope it will be used to make changes in the laws for special needs trusts. Here’s a scenario why:

A person with Down’s Syndrome has a Special Needs Trust and she needs her insulin ASAP but the trustee has refused to pay the health insurance and she can’t get the insulin. Her diabetic coma is ignored and she cannot call 911 because the trustee doesn’t want her to have a phone. If she dies, all her trust money goes to his kids.

He has a history of theft, but no criminal record because the family did not want the shame of calling him to task legally. They thought he grew out of his youthful larceny. They were wrong. The millions he was tasked to manage were too much of a temptation. She dies with no advocate and her life is forgotten. She was disabled but with assets and so was the biggest mark of all. No group advocates for her because she is a person of means and so has it all, in theory–she never has to work and her parents provided for her and she was left millions.

She was, however, a sitting duck for the modern-day Cain who lusted after the Dis-Abeled sibling. And she was slain for her assets because no one cared enough.

This is fiction, but it could well happen and probably has with some variation on this theme, because there are no checks and balances, nothing to stop unethical trustees who are not professionals in financial management firms from getting away with abuse and neglect and worse. Who would investigate her death? Who would care?

Indeed, who?

I propose street-smart laws to keep in check the white collar criminals who can get away with murder, potentially. I am going to have a contest to see what institutions care for those with special needs and write about what I find because I myself am in a fiscal crisis that is engineered by an untrustworthy trustee. The places that help will get future business from people of wealth who want to be sure the above situation never happens to their loved one. So, game on!

The first prize goes to Montana Governor Bullock who answered my plea for help with an email the very next day. He has a mission to get the State and the country back to work and I am in Vocational Rehabilitation and am determined to work again. So, kudos to Gov. Bullock and I hope and pray to be able to find a way to use my training in writing to effect change. It takes someone who has some street experience in navigating these landmines, and I do qualify for that task. I’ve lived through homelessness and yet am determined not just to survive but to thrive, Go-d willing…

And so begins this oddity of a Homeric, epic quest to get my own financial house in order and drive out the moneychangers all at the same time…it’s time for a sea-change, indeed…All aboard this ship of foolishness–necessity is the mother of legal intervention in the dire straits of perilous trusts sans protection for the innocent marks…Ahoy!

stigma blog–the burden I am

Cain asked, Am I my brother’s keeper? Well, I hope to be able to work again but so far it has not happened.

I am able to write even if I cannot stop my brother’s wrongs and no one else can either. That is alright. He gets to have his sad, pathetic life without a conscience and he can have that as his legacy for his kids. That’s his choice and I honor it completely and I totally forgive him because he has a far worse disease than I have. He is a very sick man indeed.

I am grateful I have a conscience and tonight I truly know that I can be free of his domination of my life completely. He spent a few Christmases ago telling me on the phone repeatedly what a burden I was. I get it. I do.

He’s going to be free of me and my being a burden to him very shortly. He will be able to go on doing illegal things with others and I won’t have to be abused by him any more.

Thank You, O LORD G-d! I will have a life and I will be able to work, thanks be to You and my Saviour….Rabboni, You are the greatest! I cannot wait to see how You will answer my Daniel Fast for a Financial Breakthrough….